A Common Scenario
In The Work Place.
Take Darren, for instance.
He is the only black member of his work team.
His performance is as good as, if not better than, anyone else’s in the team, but his boss has issues with him, because Darren has a darker, different skin colour to his own. Funny too that nothing is ever actually mentioned verbally by the boss about this. He just persists in criticising Darren's work to others, and sending Darren awkward glances, and disapproving negative signals. Many times, he tries his best not to acknowledge that Darren is even there. Other times he makes his disdain for Darren known through physical gestures like sharp, aggressive tone of voice, rigid posturing, inattentive listening, interrupted communication, fluctuating between unwillingness to make any eye contact, and inappropriate blank steers, grimacing, and other negative body language communications. But Darren is aware of what's going on, because he has been there before. He remembers experiencing this type of thing in school, then at college, then again at his first ever job, and now at this job with this current boss. Darren knows what's going on all right. So does his boss, and so do the other employees sitting around the office. They have all seen this kind of thing before somewhere. Darren's boss has also picked up his habit from something he heard as a kid and witnessed in school.
Different scenario. different faces, different time, different spaces, but same old familiar behaviour..
So, how would you address this situation from the point of view of being.....
1. Darren?
2. Or another white employee witnessing the situation?
3. Or another black or ethnic minority employee witnessing the situation?
4. Or a manager, supervisor or employer?
Would you.....
a) Pretend not to see the problem, ignore it, and so hope it will go away?
b) Justify the situation by saying 'these things happen, life isn't fair', and then do nothing?
c) Attempt to access the situation from all points of view, and determine the optimum, and fairest course of action?
d) Do something else, if so what?
Here is what I would do
1)... As Darren:
In Darren's shoes....
i) Firstly, I would take a measured period of time out, to access what I was feeling and experiencing, simply to nurture my soul, and for my own peace of mind and self esteem. (For believers, this is when I would take some time to pray and meditate on God's word over the situation, asking for divine guidance, clarity and support in dealing with it)
ii) Then, I would contact a trustworthy ally or mentor, this could be a GP, close friend, family member, spiritual coach, pastor of a church, counsellor, a self-help group, etc..etc...and verbally unburden and release my concerns to them, including the emotional stress I was experiencing. There are a number of excellent ways to release accumulated stress available to individual's including counselling.
(You can email me directly for more information on receiving spiritual healing and counselling.)
iii) Next I would take a measured period of time, to begin keeping a journal or diary, in which I would note private records of each and every such racially abusive encounter with my boss. Every time an incident occurred I would privately make a note in my records of the date, situation, place, time, what was said or done, who was involved and exactly how it impacted me and my ability to do my work- mentally and emotionally.
iv) I would continue to monitor the situation privately for a set amount of time possibly a month, depending on how long my work contract lasted, until a clear pattern emerged in my records.
v) With sufficient evidence under my belt in my records, I would then ask to have a private meeting with the boss concerned. At the meeting I would present the boss with my experience of his behaviour and state actual examples from my records. I would then give my boss an opportunity to rectify the situation by asking my boss what he intended to do about the behaviour, and wait for his response. If my boss was then reasonably honest and repentant, I would suggest ways he could work to do things differently by offering alternative responses, and if necessary refer him to places where he could get better awareness and understanding. I would then suggest a Grace period for the future, where my boss would get the opportunity to implement his changes and demonstrate he was actively taking steps to resolve the situation. If on the other hand my boss was unwilling to address the issue or expressed further antagonism towards me, I would make it clear that I intended to pursue remedial and corrective action, by going above him or taking my concerns to the appropriate sources of disciplinary action, and then I would follow through taking action accordingly, possibly even consulting a legal advocate, solicitor or organisation like the Equal Opportunities Commission.or Citizens Advice Bureau
vi) In the meanwhile, each time the negative behaviour is repeated in future by me boss, I would verbally or in writing, calmly and assertively point out in full view, and hearing range of other staff members around, that I thought such behaviour was 'racist, offensive and inappropriate for a place of work', and then continue to take and keep records of the incidences, so as to present them for disciplinary action. I might even make taped recordings. But the point I am making here is that I would treat the situation very seriously and make it clear that I refuse to be victimised or bullied.
2) ...As another White employee witnessing the situation.
In another white employee's shoes.......
i) Firstly, I would view this as a unique opportunity to learn something valuable about connecting with others in a work setting, and a chance to improve how I do this.
ii) I would see this, as an opportunity to personally check my own assumptions, thoughts, beliefs, prejudices, and actions concerning any ethnic minority work mates and colleagues. Then in any area I found myself wanting, I would take active steps to address and correct my behaviour. If necessary I would get myself more educated on the issue. Read books, take some more training, talk to ethnic minority people about their experiences, find out more truth about them. I would do my own private research to educate myself better.
iii) I would also talk to other white colleagues, including my boss, sharing with them my education, experience and findings. I would take personal responsibility in doing whatever I could to encourage and ensure fair, just and appropriate work practices. But above all, I would work to lead and encourage others, by my own fair and reasonable behaviour and thereby act like a positive example and role model for other white people.
3) ...As another black or Ethnic minority employee witnessing the situation.
In another black or ethnic minority employee's shoes......
i) I would offer my support to Darren, and any other ethnic minority employees who were facing similar situations, and would ask if there was anything I could do to make things easier. Such support could be anything from lending Darren a listening ear and encouraging assertiveness, to offering myself as a witness for corrective or disciplinary action if and when needed.
ii) I would actively support and engage in respectful inter-racial and inter-cultural dialogue between myself and other white employees who were up for mutual co-operation; posing questions, having discussions, and generating solutions to increase perception and understanding. This is easily done by bonding with colleagues and establishing mutual and collaborative friendships that permit the issues to be discussed openly.
ii) I would also actively support and encourage the organisations implementation of further awareness training for employees.
4....As a manager, supervisor or employer witnessing the situation.
In a employer's shoes....
i) I would take active steps to see that all the above mentioned measures were implemented in my organisation, including the monitoring of appropriate staff awareness training, dialogue, and corrective or disciplinary activity.
ii) Most particularly, I would get myself educated about the relevant issues so that I was myself perceptive of the needs of all my employees, and I was leading by example.
So here's the question again. What would you do in the above scenario?
Please feel welcome to post your generous and helpful thoughts and views here, so we can all learn and grow.
Thank you. Wishing you and yours, a complete and total healing, from any and all racism.
Peace and Light
Rev. Bola Ani - (Divine)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
For more information on where to get help concerning the issues mentioned, drop me an email to:-
Rev. Bola : theatre4mankind@yahoo.co.uk
I will respond as soon as I can, especially if you mark your email as Urgent.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Meet ALL Your SKIN TANNING Requirements Here:-
Specialists in TANNING And TANNING LOTION SOURCE
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
.
In The Work Place.
Take Darren, for instance.
He is the only black member of his work team.
His performance is as good as, if not better than, anyone else’s in the team, but his boss has issues with him, because Darren has a darker, different skin colour to his own. Funny too that nothing is ever actually mentioned verbally by the boss about this. He just persists in criticising Darren's work to others, and sending Darren awkward glances, and disapproving negative signals. Many times, he tries his best not to acknowledge that Darren is even there. Other times he makes his disdain for Darren known through physical gestures like sharp, aggressive tone of voice, rigid posturing, inattentive listening, interrupted communication, fluctuating between unwillingness to make any eye contact, and inappropriate blank steers, grimacing, and other negative body language communications. But Darren is aware of what's going on, because he has been there before. He remembers experiencing this type of thing in school, then at college, then again at his first ever job, and now at this job with this current boss. Darren knows what's going on all right. So does his boss, and so do the other employees sitting around the office. They have all seen this kind of thing before somewhere. Darren's boss has also picked up his habit from something he heard as a kid and witnessed in school.
Different scenario. different faces, different time, different spaces, but same old familiar behaviour..
So, how would you address this situation from the point of view of being.....
1. Darren?
2. Or another white employee witnessing the situation?
3. Or another black or ethnic minority employee witnessing the situation?
4. Or a manager, supervisor or employer?
Would you.....
a) Pretend not to see the problem, ignore it, and so hope it will go away?
b) Justify the situation by saying 'these things happen, life isn't fair', and then do nothing?
c) Attempt to access the situation from all points of view, and determine the optimum, and fairest course of action?
d) Do something else, if so what?
Here is what I would do
1)... As Darren:
In Darren's shoes....
i) Firstly, I would take a measured period of time out, to access what I was feeling and experiencing, simply to nurture my soul, and for my own peace of mind and self esteem. (For believers, this is when I would take some time to pray and meditate on God's word over the situation, asking for divine guidance, clarity and support in dealing with it)
ii) Then, I would contact a trustworthy ally or mentor, this could be a GP, close friend, family member, spiritual coach, pastor of a church, counsellor, a self-help group, etc..etc...and verbally unburden and release my concerns to them, including the emotional stress I was experiencing. There are a number of excellent ways to release accumulated stress available to individual's including counselling.
(You can email me directly for more information on receiving spiritual healing and counselling.)
iii) Next I would take a measured period of time, to begin keeping a journal or diary, in which I would note private records of each and every such racially abusive encounter with my boss. Every time an incident occurred I would privately make a note in my records of the date, situation, place, time, what was said or done, who was involved and exactly how it impacted me and my ability to do my work- mentally and emotionally.
iv) I would continue to monitor the situation privately for a set amount of time possibly a month, depending on how long my work contract lasted, until a clear pattern emerged in my records.
v) With sufficient evidence under my belt in my records, I would then ask to have a private meeting with the boss concerned. At the meeting I would present the boss with my experience of his behaviour and state actual examples from my records. I would then give my boss an opportunity to rectify the situation by asking my boss what he intended to do about the behaviour, and wait for his response. If my boss was then reasonably honest and repentant, I would suggest ways he could work to do things differently by offering alternative responses, and if necessary refer him to places where he could get better awareness and understanding. I would then suggest a Grace period for the future, where my boss would get the opportunity to implement his changes and demonstrate he was actively taking steps to resolve the situation. If on the other hand my boss was unwilling to address the issue or expressed further antagonism towards me, I would make it clear that I intended to pursue remedial and corrective action, by going above him or taking my concerns to the appropriate sources of disciplinary action, and then I would follow through taking action accordingly, possibly even consulting a legal advocate, solicitor or organisation like the Equal Opportunities Commission.or Citizens Advice Bureau
vi) In the meanwhile, each time the negative behaviour is repeated in future by me boss, I would verbally or in writing, calmly and assertively point out in full view, and hearing range of other staff members around, that I thought such behaviour was 'racist, offensive and inappropriate for a place of work', and then continue to take and keep records of the incidences, so as to present them for disciplinary action. I might even make taped recordings. But the point I am making here is that I would treat the situation very seriously and make it clear that I refuse to be victimised or bullied.
2) ...As another White employee witnessing the situation.
In another white employee's shoes.......
i) Firstly, I would view this as a unique opportunity to learn something valuable about connecting with others in a work setting, and a chance to improve how I do this.
ii) I would see this, as an opportunity to personally check my own assumptions, thoughts, beliefs, prejudices, and actions concerning any ethnic minority work mates and colleagues. Then in any area I found myself wanting, I would take active steps to address and correct my behaviour. If necessary I would get myself more educated on the issue. Read books, take some more training, talk to ethnic minority people about their experiences, find out more truth about them. I would do my own private research to educate myself better.
iii) I would also talk to other white colleagues, including my boss, sharing with them my education, experience and findings. I would take personal responsibility in doing whatever I could to encourage and ensure fair, just and appropriate work practices. But above all, I would work to lead and encourage others, by my own fair and reasonable behaviour and thereby act like a positive example and role model for other white people.
3) ...As another black or Ethnic minority employee witnessing the situation.
In another black or ethnic minority employee's shoes......
i) I would offer my support to Darren, and any other ethnic minority employees who were facing similar situations, and would ask if there was anything I could do to make things easier. Such support could be anything from lending Darren a listening ear and encouraging assertiveness, to offering myself as a witness for corrective or disciplinary action if and when needed.
ii) I would actively support and engage in respectful inter-racial and inter-cultural dialogue between myself and other white employees who were up for mutual co-operation; posing questions, having discussions, and generating solutions to increase perception and understanding. This is easily done by bonding with colleagues and establishing mutual and collaborative friendships that permit the issues to be discussed openly.
ii) I would also actively support and encourage the organisations implementation of further awareness training for employees.
4....As a manager, supervisor or employer witnessing the situation.
In a employer's shoes....
i) I would take active steps to see that all the above mentioned measures were implemented in my organisation, including the monitoring of appropriate staff awareness training, dialogue, and corrective or disciplinary activity.
ii) Most particularly, I would get myself educated about the relevant issues so that I was myself perceptive of the needs of all my employees, and I was leading by example.
So here's the question again. What would you do in the above scenario?
Please feel welcome to post your generous and helpful thoughts and views here, so we can all learn and grow.
Thank you. Wishing you and yours, a complete and total healing, from any and all racism.
Peace and Light
Rev. Bola Ani - (Divine)
----------------------------------------------------------------------
For more information on where to get help concerning the issues mentioned, drop me an email to:-
Rev. Bola : theatre4mankind@yahoo.co.uk
I will respond as soon as I can, especially if you mark your email as Urgent.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Meet ALL Your SKIN TANNING Requirements Here:-
Specialists in TANNING And TANNING LOTION SOURCE
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
.
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